By Lali Galuppo, Buenos Aires Reporter
Yesterday, thousands of women came together in Buenos Aires to spotlight the domestic violence women in Latin America experience every day. The push was made through social networks by using a hashtag #niunamenos (or Not One Women Less) in order to recall the murderers and domestic violence women are experiencing in Argentina – often referred to as femicide – and, of course, demanding the government to take action.
The numbers are real: Every 31 hours a woman is murdered in Argentina. The figure was collected by La Casa Del Encuentro, a nonprofit organization in Buenos Aires focused on women’s rights, because Argentina still doesn’t have an official system in place collecting data solely focused on violence and murders against women. This makes it difficult to meet the protesters demands of implementing tougher laws for abusers. Domestic violence has been ongoing issue in Argentina but what brought it to the forefront was the brutal murder of 14-year-old Chiara Paez who was three months pregnant and buried in her 16-year-old boyfriend’s backyard. He’s being charged with femicide and forced abortion.
As a single gal in my early 30s living in Buenos Aires, these daunting statistics make dating here super scary. It’s hard enough for me to trust people overall, let alone in the dating scene, so I know it may sound a little bit exaggerated but these figures do not help at all. And, while I’m well aware that most abusers against women are men they know, I haven’t been inclined to date anyone outside of my friend network. So hook up apps like Tinder, Happn, and Badoo, where you get to know someone through just a couple of pictures is not my cup of tea.
In fact, it makes me more anxious. If I do not like picking and buying my clothes online, why should I like “picking” a man the same way? I am more into the tête-à-tête encounter. I’m aware that I can have the same results either way but online dating is definitely not for me. I believe I’ll get a better spectrum of a person if I meet him in person. But considering the situation in Argentina, nothing is really a sure thing.
And, I’m not alone with this fear. My girlfriends feel the same way. We’re all freaked out about what is going on in Argentina. So much so, that at this point I’ve sensed my standards have gotten to the point where I often say:
"No busco alguien que me quiera, si no que no me mate."
Is the only safe way to date is the old school way? As in hanging out with friends, being introduced to a friend of a friend or going to cultural/sport events. Nobody has the exact formula, it just happens, right? As the saying goes, it’s better to be alone than in bad company.