I was really hoping we could leave the sexism and stigma associated with having multiple sexual partners behind in 2015, but apparently that was too much to ask for. You'd think by now that your "number" doesn't matter, but the results of a new survey suggest the opposite of that. U.K.-based dating website IllicitEncounters.com surveyed 1,000 people and revealed that, according to both men and women, 10 is the perfect number when it comes to lovers. In fact, respondents got even more specific and reported that between eight and 12 partners is ideal. So in other words, if you've had more than 10 notches on your bedpost you're too promiscuous, and if you've had fewer, you're probably a prude. Seriously?
Wait, it gets better: Male respondents cared more about how many lovers their prospective sexual partners have had, with men reporting they were "less likely" to sleep with someone who's had 11 or more partners than women were.
It's 2016. Why is this still a thing? How many people we sleep with in this
lifetime is our problem, and our problem only. Just the thought of there being
an "ideal" number when it comes to sexual partners is nauseating.
To be fair, it's worth noting that IllicitEncounters.com is actually an extramarital affairs website. That's right, it's a site where bored married folks can go find a fling. Moreover, the site also released a survey claiming that drinking red wine could suggest that your partner's a cheater, another one that claims most cheaters buy their SO's designer clothes for Christmas, and one about how a third of guys would sleep with their best friend's partner — like, come on, guys. Are you even trying? Suffice it to say, the science behind these is suspect.
Still, this ridiculous survey is especially disturbing for us women
who already have to deal with society constantly telling us how to act, how to
look, and what to do with our bodies. All you have to do is watch a few of the
GOP presidential debates and hear the candidates lecture on how they want to do away with non-profit organizations like
Planned Parenthood to know that we're still living in a world that couldn't care less about women.
Slut-shaming people for the number of sexual partners they have is offensive. Let's put it to rest once and for all.