I migrated to the U.S. when I was seven years old. The longer I live here the more disconnected I feel from my roots, but also, the more I realize that I will never belong here. I have formed a very intentional group of friends who love and protect me and understand what it feels like to have your mamis confused as to who you are becoming. I am in a group chat with some of my closest Latina friends. We talk all day, every day. We share our accomplishments, try to remember the night before, and decide what to eat for dinner with one another.
It is the most invigorating thing that has ever existed in my life. Therapy is a luxury not many of us have. The connection between females continues to be an outlet for many marginalized women.
My group chat is composed of immigrant Latinas, queer, brown, light-skinned, and Spanish-speaking chingonas who love casual sex as much as we love the committed partners we have. My group text is my lifeline. We talk about everything and help each other process.
Living as an adult in America means adapting and adjusting the expectations of what my life will look like over the next few years. I am currently pondering my life decisions with them. We are at a crux, growing up and finding independence while still needing each other, because by now we have learned that men come and go but amigas stay forever.
I laugh so much with my group. I think a lot of us have found family through our chats. We have found solace. When the world feels too cruel, and our lovers feel so clueless, group text with your best amigxs can save you.
When one of my friends came out, she turned to us when her mom tried to
force her church indoctrination onto her queer body. When my white boyfriend
does things that make me want to run, I turn to them. When one of the chingonas
wants to let go and forget her exhausting day, she turns to the group chat.
When one of us wakes up with a man in our bed who has overstayed his welcome,
we turn to the group chat.
The revolution is being scripted in our group chats, mark my words. The affirmation and positivity that I receive from my friends on my group chat needs to be printed onto a motivational poster. We are loving and uninhibited in our passion for one another. We are the support system we cannot find in our well-intentioned immigrant parents.
I am and I exist for the benefit of my group chat. I wake up looking at my phone trying to connect and trying to feel something in a world that has made me cold. I go to sleep seeing their faces. Group chats are the only safe spaces some of us have, especially for those who have nowhere to call home. Group chats are oftentimes the only place we see ourselves reflected back.
I am so lucky for my friends, but I am even luckier that we have a group chat where we can form our own community even though we live all over the U.S.